Wednesday, 20 April 2016

Shakespeare 400 years on



“Four hundred years is a long time”, said Polonius. “It’s a long time to be dead”.

“I know”, said Shylock. “But he left behind a few things to remember him by. You and me, for example.”

“Very true”, said Polonius. “And not just us. There’s Falstaff, and Prospero, and Romeo and Juliet, and King Henry V …”

“But Henry existed anyway”, said Shylock. “Bill Shakespeare didn’t invent him.”

“True”, said Polonius, “but nobody thinks today about Henry V without remembering the Shakespeare version, however inaccurate it might be”.

“And ditto for Macbeth, Richard III, Julius Caesar and a few others”, said Shylock. “But does it matter?”

“Not really”, said Polonius. “It’s the drama that counts. As my mate Hamlet says, ‘the play’s the thing’”.

“Your mate?” said Shylock. “Didn’t he stick a sword in you in Act Three?”

“Indeed he did”, said Polonius. “But it was a case of mistaken identity, so I can’t really hold it against him. And I always come back to life for the next performance, which I’ve been doing the past four hundred and more years, just like you”.

“And that’s the point, isn’t it?” said Shylock. “People have been talking about us for four centuries, which they wouldn’t have done if Bill hadn’t created us. And he gave us some great lines – how about my ‘If you prick us, do we not bleed; if you tickle us, do we not laugh’; I love that line.

“I’ve got some good ones too”, said Polonius. “I particularly like ‘Neither a borrower nor a lender be’”.

“Hang about”, said Shylock, “that’s my whole profession gone for a Burton there.”

“Perhaps you should have followed my advice”, said Polonius. “Moneylending didn’t do you much good, did it? You ended up losing the lot.”

“At least I was still alive in Act Five”, said Shylock. “And it would have been a pretty boring play without me as the villain of the piece.”

“And there’s something else to think about”, said Polonius. “I wonder if there are people today, four hundred years on, who are making up little stories about you and me and all the other characters, and having all sorts of fun as they imagine what we might be saying to each other had we really existed?”

“Come off it”, said Shylock. “You don’t think there’s anyone around who’s that daft, do you?”

© John Welford



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