Was by no means the worst
It was best to be wary
Of her sister Queen Mary
Queen Victoria
Went to a trattoria
Albert sat down and snoozed
She wasn’t amused
Jeremy Corbyn
Found it absorbin’
To take copious notes
When campaigning for votes
Theresa May
Was discovered one day
In search of an exit
Other than Brexit
Nigel Farage
Went to his garage
His car was resplendent
And, of course, independent
Sam Allardyce
Does not need asking twice
He’ll declare black is white
If the money is right
William the Second
Was generally reckoned
A total disgrace
As well as red in the face
Edmund Clerihew Bentley
Always did things gently
When it came to writing verse
He was never less than terse
Margaret Thatcher?
No-one could catch her
As everyone would learn
She was not one to turn
Anthony Sher
Did not star in Ben Hur
His talents shone clear
In his Stratford King Lear
General George Gorringe
Was eating an orange
To celebrate the time
He provided a rhyme
Donald J Trump
Was given a thump
His chances are shrinking
Or is this wishful thinking?
Hillary Clinton
Was putting a tint on
When seeking votes, east or west
It’s always good to look your best
William Shakespeare
Often makes appear
For me, lots and lots
Of ideas for good plots
Charles John Huffam Dickens
The plot often thickens
In Bleak House there’s thick mist
But not in Oliver Twist
Geoffrey Chaucer
Drank from a saucer
As did most of the males
In his Canterbury Tales
King Richard the Third
Might have thought it absurd
That his bones would long fester
Neath a car park in Leicester
Percy Bysshe Shelley
Was putting on a welly
When out popped a toad –
But it didn’t get an ode
Emperor Nero
Was never a hero
He wrote many a Latin idyll
But he never played the fiddle
Emperor Commodus
Never kept the job in focus
He thought himself a doughty fighter
Instead? A nasty little blighter
Alistair McGowan
Has audiences wowin’
Footy’s his obsession
But he makes a good impression
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